Modern life isn’t designed for introspection. It’s designed for people to continue with the status quo and not question why things are the way they are or why they believe what they believe. It’s designed to keep people’s focus outward instead of inward, on the superficial instead of the profound. As a result, you can understand why going on a journey of self-discovery isn’t always the easiest thing to do.
It’s possible you’ve actually tried to begin this kind of journey, but you’ve found that you weren’t able to continue for one reason or another. Or maybe you would like to go on such a journey and you would just like to be aware of what you need to prepare for before you begin.
To help you better understand what may hinder or be hindering your self-discovery journey, here are five things to keep in mind.
1. Lack of a Clear Why
When going on a journey of self-discovery, having a clear why can be very helpful. In other words, you might want to ask yourself questions like, “Why am I going on this journey?” and “What am I hoping to discover?”
Not having a clear why can make it harder to know what questions to ask. And if you don’t know what questions to ask, you won’t know where to look for the answers you’re searching for.
For instance, are you going on this journey because you want clarity about what to do in terms of a career? Or do you just feel a general sense of not living up to your potential? Or do you feel like you’re not living as authentically as you could be?
Knowing exactly what you’re looking for will help you know what questions to ask and what kinds of things you would like to do or explore to find the answers.
2. Fear
Fear can stop us from uncovering our true selves in more ways than one. Fear can keep us from asking ourselves the hard questions and then looking deep for the answers. Fear can stop us from trying or exploring new things or ways of doing things that may serve us better than whatever we’re doing now.
Fear can stop us from living authentically as we discover our authentic selves. We may be afraid of disappointing people who may be used to seeing us a different way. Or we may be afraid of going against the authority figures in our life.
Fear can stop us from doing many things. But if you’re on a journey of self-discovery and would like it to result in lasting change, you have to make the decision not to let fear stop you.
3. Tradition
If you’re someone who lives for doing things the conventional way, I have to tell you that it will be very hard to discover who you really are. Self-discovery very often requires you to go against tradition and convention.
It will require you to ask questions about why you do what you do. It will cause you to question things you’ve long held to be absolute truth. It will require you to unlearn a lot of what you’ve been taught and live in a way you’ve never lived before.
While tradition in itself isn’t a bad thing, wanting to do things the traditional way can get in the way of exploring new ways of thinking and behaving. So, to really discover yourself, you’ll probably have to be willing to embrace some degree of the nontraditional or unconventional.
4. Habit
Habits can be very hard to break. If, for instance, you’re in the habit of seeing yourself a certain way, even if you uncover hidden parts of yourself, you may have a hard time revealing those other parts simply because you’re in the habit of living differently.
When on a self-discovery journey, it’s important to keep the why at the forefront of your mind (see #1). If you’re going on this journey because you would like to live more authentically, for example, keep that in mind whenever you find yourself falling back into old habits.
But at the same time, be compassionate with yourself and don’t beat yourself up if you find yourself struggling to break a certain habit. Every day is a day to try again.
5. Interruptions and Distractions
Life is full of interruptions and distractions. When you want to take time out of your day to look deeper and examine your life and your beliefs, you’ll find plenty of things that want to interfere with this process.
Maybe you’ll feel the need to check your email for the fifteenth time. Or maybe you’ll notice that the kitchen floor could use a good mopping. Or maybe this is when your friend insists that you go shopping with her so you can help her pick out a new outfit for an important event.
If you’re serious about going on this journey, you might want to set aside some time every week to devote yourself to it. And at that time, you should silence your phone or put it in a place where it won’t distract you. You might also want to alert everyone who might be tempted to reach out to you at that time that you’re dedicating this time to something important to you.
It’s up to you if you want to explain what you’re really doing. But unless you know that the people you tell will be genuinely supportive of your efforts to uncover who you really are, you might want to be a little more vague.
Again, though, as with #4, don’t beat yourself up if you can’t continue this long-term. Sometimes a break might be just what you need to have the breakthrough you’ve been looking for. And since a journey of self-discovery is a lifelong process, it’s important to remember that just living your life is part of the journey, with all the distractions and interruptions along the way.
What to Take Away
It is possible to go on a journey of self-discovery even in this modern world. And you don’t have to go to the middle of the desert or the forest to do it. All you need is a clear why, some time that you set aside to look deeper, and a willingness to push past fear, go against tradition, and break old habits. With that, you have essentially all you need to go on your self-discovery journey.
~ Ashley C.