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Thanks for the Trauma, Mom and Dad: How We Can Turn Their Parenting Fails into Our Success Story | by Farzeen Shaikh | Aug, 2024

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Ah, parents. They’re the gift that keeps on giving, aren’t they? From unforgettable family vacations to unforgettable emotional scars, they’ve certainly left their mark. We’ve all been there: criticized for our choices, pushed into activities we hated, or embarrassed in front of friends and family. It’s a wonder any of us turned out okay. But here’s the kicker — we did. And it’s time to turn those parenting fails into our own success story.

Credit: Psychology Today
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Picture this: You come home with a report card that’s not perfect, but pretty darn good. Instead of a pat on the back, you get a lecture about how you could do better . Or remember that time you poured your heart into an art project, only for your parents to suggest a more “practical” hobby, like accounting? Classic.

These moments stick with us. They chip away at our confidence and make us feel misunderstood. But they also teach us resilience and independence. Who knew that being constantly told to be more like your overachieving cousin could be character-building?

Despite the emotional roller coaster, our parents did give us some useful things. They provided for us, loved us in their own unique ways, and tried their best — but with a few missteps along the way. Let’s give them some credit: they didn’t exactly get a parenting manual. They were winging it, much like we’re all doing in life.

For instance, your mom’s relentless nagging about cleaning your room might have made you a neat freak. Or your dad’s insistence on you joining the debate team, even though you hated public speaking, might have turned you into a confident communicator. See? Silver linings everywhere.

The real trick is not just surviving our parents but thriving despite — or maybe because of — them. Here’s how we can flip the script:

  1. Empathy, Anyone?: Try to see things from their perspective. They were likely repeating what they learned from their parents. Understanding this can help us forgive their shortcomings.
  2. Open Conversations: If you’re brave enough, have a heart-to-heart with your parents. Let them know how their actions affected you. You might be surprised at how much they care, even if they have a funny way of showing it.
  3. Boundaries Are Beautiful: It’s perfectly okay to set limits. If certain topics always lead to hurt feelings, politely steer the conversation elsewhere.
  4. Self-Improvement: Focus on becoming the person you want to be. Build your confidence, pursue your passions, and remember that you are not defined by their expectations.

We all want to make our parents proud, even if we roll our eyes at their advice. By turning their fails into our wins, we can create a success story they’ll brag about to their friends. Become the best at what you love, and you’ll not only make yourself happy but also give them some interesting topic to discuss about at the next family gathering.

So, here’s to you, Mom and Dad, for the good, the bad, and the hilariously misguided. Thanks for the trauma — it made us stronger. We’ve taken your parenting fails and turned them into a playbook for success. Now, if you’ll excuse us, we have some world-conquering to do. And yes, we’ll call you later.



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