You Can’t Be Happy In A Relationship If You’re Not Ok With Yourself | by Domino Cat | Mar, 2024

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They say “misery loves company,” but that shouldn’t apply to love. For the past year, I’ve been on a journey of self-discovery, a glorious adventure known as “flying solo.” It wasn’t always easy. There were nights spent staring at the ceiling, the silence punctuated only by the echo of my own thoughts. Doubt, like a persistent weed, would creep in, whispering questions about whether being alone was my permanent fate. Yet, amidst the solitude, there was an unexpected liberation. I rediscovered the forgotten joy of my own company. Mornings were mine to greet with a leisurely cup of coffee and a book, evenings were open for spontaneous adventures with friends, and weekends became canvases for solo excursions or the unfettered pursuit of hobbies long neglected.

This newfound independence wasn’t about shutting myself off from potential connections. During this solo odyssey, I met a surprising number of people — interesting, funny, and intelligent individuals who, on paper at least, seemed like perfect partners. Dates were plentiful, conversations flowed easily, and there was a certain comfort in their company. We shared similar interests, enjoyed lively discussions, and there was a sense of camaraderie. A nagging feeling persisted, a hollowness beneath the surface. The spark, that exhilarating jolt of genuine connection, was missing. These dates felt more like well-rehearsed performances, a social obligation masquerading as a budding romance. The thought of entering a relationship with any of them left me feeling uninspired, a sense that something fundamental was lacking.

This realization struck me like a bolt of lightning. I was on the verge of settling, of choosing companionship over true love simply because the fear of loneliness loomed large. It’s a trap I see many fall into, a desperate attempt to fill a void with something that doesn’t quite fit. Settling for a relationship based solely on the avoidance of solitude is a recipe for unhappiness, both for myself and the unsuspecting partner. It would be unfair to them to enter a relationship where my own sense of fulfillment rested on their shoulders, and for me, it would be a slow suffocation, a constant reminder of the genuine connection I craved but was afraid to pursue.

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